Monday, May 17, 2010

College Lessons: Entry 3

Lesson 3:
Life lesson number three really started the summer before college started. I think it's a lesson that isn't ever really completely learned or anything that I've totally mastered yet. But like I said I'm not really sure if anyone masters it. But anyway lesson three is dealing with loss. I'm not saying that my whole family died or something. It wasn't that big of a lesson. I guess a better way to say it would be dealing with the loss of best friends. I lost my best friend of 6 years this year, as I blogged about a few weeks ago and it's been hard. I think it was especially hard for me to accept the fact that it was all a choice on her part. If she had died it almost would've been easier for me. But I knew that she was actively avoiding and ignoring me. That's probably a terrible thing to say but it's true. So I went off to college thinking that I'd meet tons of new girls and have a new best friend and fill the void that she left. But it never really happened. I made new friends, sure, but no one really filled Jane's place. And that is the lesson I learned. You can't find "substitute" people. Everyone has their own distinctive mark/place in your life. You can't replace anyone. And I've learned to accept that. I lost my best friend of 6 years and no one will take her place. I can just hope that I'll find a new best friend along the way that'll make the feelings of betrayal or what not go away and help me move on.

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